Room to Breathe

The Globe and Mail: The unexpectant father

A Doctor is suing another Doctor, after learning that their affair 6 years ago, has resulted in a child and a court ruling he must pay $800/month in child support. He is suing for emotional distress, after the fraud and theft claims were dismissed.

Two colleagues engaged in an affair 6 years ago, and the woman KEPT the load in her mouth, stored it, and used it to have a baby later. DNA proved the child to be his. Imagine the feeling to learn a child is yours, and you never even slept with the woman!

“She asserts that when plaintiff ‘delivered’ his sperm, it was a gift – an absolute and irrevocable transfer of title to property from a donor to a donee,” the decision said. “There was no agreement that the original deposit would be returned upon request.”

theglobeandmail.com

As if he was going to ask for his spunk back! I’m sure this case will make many men think twice next time a woman gets up to spit. This takes the term “spit or swallow” to new levels. “Do you spit, swallow, or keep for a year and use to get pregnant without my knowledge.”

My lack of posting the past few days/weeks have been a result of, well…nothing to say! But with certain voyeurs who must miss me, I feel less inclined to share.

So much going on inside my head, but I stare at the wall thinking nothing. I’m fighting my minds determination to send me into a deep depression. I need to look at things positively, and move on.

Lots going on too. Personal things to catch up on. Visits with friends and family, cleaning my apartment…. Most people would think that is just a simple weekend task, but when you have neglected the duty for the past, oh I don’t know, 3 years for some things, the job becomes quite large.

I have a pile of clothing (literally) in my room referred to as, “clothes mountain”. The pile sits on top of a storage chest (who knows what’s in there anymore!), and is as high as the light switch. From there it descends to the 4 laundry baskets sitting on the floor beside the chest. 1 basket was 1/2 empty, and that’s where my cat used to sleep. Within clothes mountain are clothes that I haven’t worn in perhaps 2 years, but I just can’t seem to get rid of things. So, because my closet and drawers are all full, I wear only the clothes (clean of course) on top of clothes mountain. I do laundry, and it’s all folder on top. Only the clothes that are worn most often are there. The others get pushed to the bottom and forgotten.

So on Sunday, mom and I went out for breakfast and I got inspired. I’ve been bitched at for the past 8 years by my bf about the situation, and have never done anything. So I went to Canadian Tire and bought a tarp. I took the tarp outside into the parking lot and spread it out (I needed the room, and there just isn’t enough in my apartment.) Mom brought out all my clothes in armfuls, and I sorted into piles of lights, darks and mediums. My intention was to wash everything, since I found cat car embedded within some of the clothes, and my cat died a year ago. I didn’t think that was right to give clothes away with cat hair.

I completed this, and headed to the Laundromat with 8 full garbage bags (we didn’t even touch the closet or drawers!). I asked if they had a drop off for clothes to be donated, the girl told me I could just leave them there, and they would take them. The CDA picks up lost clothes there, and they sell it to Value Village (used clothing store). She also said that by law they have to wash the clothes before selling them. I was going to call them for pickup anyways, so this worked out great! I sorted my clothes quickly into what I wanted to keep, and what to give away. I washed the rest.

I walked out with 3 laundry baskets (1 was big blankets), and 1 was old jeans. The jeans I am going to make a quilt with, so I thought that was a pretty good purging experience.

My friend was pissed though. “Why didn’t you let me go through it first? You have nice clothes” I told her it was just stuff that didn’t fit. She said, “but they would fit me!” Oh well. I still have more to go through. I told her I would give her first dibs next time.

Problem now is, I still don’t have the room in my bedroom, and the laundry baskets are sitting in the middle of my living room until I get inspired again and empty the closet.

Weekend. I’ll do it this weekend I promise. Perhaps I should try the Clean Sweep tactic again with my whole apartment. Seemed to work!

What a wonderful week it’s been. First I lose my wallet, and then I lose my job. Isn’t life grand?

I’m a little hung over right now. Too much to drink, and my body is aching with the amount I smoked last night. I slow destructive death I am suffering.

My night consisted of a 15 minute notice to being “laid-off”, followed by a few hours of binge drinking and compulsive smoking. I forgot to eat dinner.

I’m wondering when it will sink in that I don’t have to wake up Monday morning to work. Probably when the repo-dude comes collecting! LOL

That’s right. I’m taking it all in a stride. Everything happens for a reason, and change in life is inevitable.

Wow. My eyes go really blue when my pupils are dilated and I’m really drunk.

I thought my day couldn’t get worse, and then I realized I lost my wallet. I feel like throwing up, and I can’t concentrate. I know it’s not the end of the world, but it sure feels like it.

Everything! Little notes, all my “points” cards, credit cards, health card, bank cards, but the biggest thing that is upsetting me, is I lost my driver’s license. It costs $100 to replace. Who knows how much a health card costs! I still have (had) the old one (without the picture), so I don’t even know how easy that will be to replace. Thanks God I still have my SIN card and birth certificate. Those I don’t keep in my wallet. I also have a couple credit cards (ya, I know I have too many) here at home that I don’t use, so atleast I have a signature to show. FUCK!

I retraced my steps, and the last time I remember taking it out was yesterday at lunch. My mom came and picked me up from work, and we went for pizza. I pulled out my wallet and offered to pay. She of course declined my offer, and now I can’t remember having it after that. I called the pizza place and nothing.

It’s not like there is anything of value in there. Just a bunch of business cards, my Subway Card, receipts and little notes.

I called MasterCard to see if anyone has tried to use the card. Nothing. So that makes me feel better. I have another card in there, but it’s not activated, so no one could use it.

I am so pissed off right now.

My Grandmother has to be either the most naive person on earth, or she really is that forgiving. I know she’s very strong in her spiritual beliefs, but isn’t there a line drawn for just how much you can take and forgive? Last time I checked, Adultery was a commandment.

She drives me crazy. Always trying to help. If I let her, she would cut my meat for me. It pains her to see others struggle, and she always has a better way (her way) of doing things. So any opportunity to give her 2 cents, she does.

I’ve learned to just let it go and say, “She’s old, and doesn’t have much else. I’ll just keep quiet, and give her this”.

But it drives me nuts how people take advantage of her. My AuntB and UncleA for instance. They aren’t actually my family, but they were close friends of my Grandparents, and therefore my mom and her brother’s called them Aunt and Uncle; and now we do too. They aren’t too well off (Physically. Financially they are fine; just retired). My Grandma is forever taking them to the doctors (AuntB is a hypochondriac), doing their groceries, cleaning their home and anything else they need. My Grandma loves to be needed. Especially since Grandpa died a couple years ago. Now she needs to be needed.

Recently AuntB & UncleA sold their home and are moving into a retirement community. A home which is much more accessible for them as their health deteriorates. Grandma has told me she is helping them pack.

My mom and I were talking though, and she said AuntB asked Grandma NOT to help them. I tried to correct her, but she said, “No. And Grandma is rather upset with this. AuntB probably doesn’t want her to find evidence of her affair with my father.”

This new revelation has me thinking now that my Grandmother is the dumbest woman in the world. So. Here my Grandmother is, being best friend’s with a woman who slept with her husband. My mom proceeds to tell me the story. I can’t believe Grandma ever told her. Anyway, years ago, AuntB and Grandpa had an affair. One that went on for some time. Then one day the 4 of them (AuntB, UncleA, my Grandma and my Grandpa), sat at the kitchen table and decided that, this was going to stop now, and their family lives would continue on unaffected. In those days, back in the 50’s or 60’s, you didn’t get divorced, so that wasn’t even an option.

On one hand I think my Grandmother is strong, with her ability to cope with such a travesty to her marriage. On the other hand, I can’t understand why she continued to remain friends, BEST FRIENDS, with the slut AuntB, even after Grandpa died.

I think the conclusion that should have been made that day around the kitchen table, was a spouse swap. Grandma gets UncleA (a hard working genuine man who wouldn’t have sat on his ass all day watching TV), and Grandpa could have done whatever the fuck he wants. He did anyways.